sianz...

getting super no life... wake up at 0600 daily, travel full 1 hr just to get to work, have lunch at 1300, got off work at 1730, reach hm an hour later... eat dinner... then go for tuition at 1905... tuition ends at 2130... by the time i got hm, it's 2200 le... watch watever i've recorded(usually "good luck") then it's time for bed...

getting more and more tired as time goes by... think i can nv do any 8 hrs job... will get damn tired...

anyway, gtg le... eyes are getting droppy...

ciaoz...

day

okay... i have a confession to make... i'm starting to dislike ppl trying to link me up with others... i.e. spreading untrue rumours... and teasing me bout it... it's slightly getting onto my nerves... pls dun tease me too much le okay? no point toking bout it when nothing is going on... my friendship with ALL my guy frens are purely platonic... dun let ur imaginations run wild and start toking nonsense... i DUN need to be linked to like half the guys in my class now... being in a relationship is currently the last thing on my mind... so pls stop hor... thx ar....

anyway, back to today... today was slacking in the morning... cos wendy got half day off... so she came in late...

know something is wrong cos this morning when we reach, wendy is not there... she's usually the early bird... end up being correct... was reading lp's cocktail book when shirlin came to me and told me tat wendy asked her to give me some work... she added wat she want me to do to wendy's pile of work... since wendy is not there, i started with shirlin's first...

halfway thru work, alvin msged me... hahahaha... so funny... cos he ask if i got a lot of work to do ma... apparently at oocl's transhipment dept, it's more hectic then misc's tanshipment dept... tat is to an intern...

after i finished with the work give, waited for a while before wendy gave me another set of work to do... to update on the containers on vessels... by the time i finished, it's 1730 le... just right time to knock off... before i packed me things, wendy told me a bad news.... tat i have to work on sat as well... sob sob... tot weekend can sleep longer... but now, still have to work... wat a cheap labour...

anyway, slacking at hm after work... cos today no tuition... so happy... 8th lesson coming soon... hahahaha...

anyway, my eyelids are getting heavy le... so i shall stop here...

ciaoz...

well well... days in itp is getting more and more... at least tat's better than nothing to do...

yesterday wendy(a colleague in transhipment) taught me how to use portnet and sealiner... she only show me one example then gave me a stack to do on my own... wat i'm supposed to do was to renominate the vessels for a particular B/L... was quite chim... but managed to grasp it after a few tries...

guess who i met on my way hm yest? i met amelia... and just right at tat station is where lp alights... anyway, went to give dafinah tuition... tuition went quite well... cos she's paying attention...

continued doing the renomination today... until lunchtime... went to the hawker centre opp harbour front... food there is super cheap and nice... until we reach the entrance of the coy then hf realised tat she lost her office access card... so in the end we back tracked and splited up... hf and lp went searching on the way to the HC while me and shi mei search the office...

in the end, we can't find it in the office... while waiting for them to come back, one of the staff came and look for us... she ask if there's a goh somebody with us... then she said tat she found her card at the HC... hf damn heng lor... she lost her MISC access card and just right got picked up by a MISC staff...

after lunch, was asked to update the excel sheets for the diff vessels and voyage... quite tedious cos have to be very careful and the format is quite diff...

beginning to think tat it's hectic working in a shipping line... cos watever u do is strongly against time and little mistakes cld be made... diff cust are also faced by the ppl working there...

did the updating frm 1415 till 1715... then went toilet with lp... hahaha... dilly dally until 1720 since they got nothing else for me to do... went to look for hf and sm when it's time to go... hahaha... nan de i'm the one to do tat cos usually i'm still doing something when they've finished for the day...

think i very dao there... cos the only few ppl i greet in the morning are the uncles sitting beside and in front of me... only cos they greet me first... my only interaction with my supervisor so far is only on the first day... for less than 2 hrs... the rest of the time, i'm sitting quietly at my table doing my work, silience only broken by the kopi auntie asking me wat i wanna drink, the visits to lp, lunchtime, visits to toilet, toking to wendy bout the work she gave me, the visits by hf when she photocopy things. the occasional work frm shirlin, the occasional small talk with the uncle beside me and of cos, after work!! super sianz lor... think i gonna get very bad grades for itp le... die lar...

super tired now... all cos i watch tv until 1200 last night... the super lag of sleep... have to get up at 0615 the latest everyday... i suspect we are the only few tat starts work so early... alvin and jac they all all starts at 0900... worst is tat i have to travel for full one hrs to work everyday, frm the north to south of sg... tat's bout across the country...

hahahaha... kuku liao... desperately need my sleep now...

ciaoz...

phew... the first day at itp finally ended...

hahahaha... was actually quite fun for me la...

reached harbour front mrt station at 0810... surprisingly, lp and hf already reach le...

so went up to the company... we damn lucky la... first day at work then met a misc employee... hahahha... just right we also going up till 11th storey... then she tapped her card for us for both the lift and the door of misc... hahahaha...

was shown into the meeting rm by ms roz... hahahaha... tok cock there while waiting for the boss to come... got our lift and entry passes too...

last person same itp coy as us de is shi mei frm class 11...

was shown the diff supervisors by the boss... then each of us got attached to a diff supervisor and department...

i was attached to the transhipment dept, lp to operations, hf to import and shi mei to export...

had a briefing frm my supervisor while waiting for wendy of transhipment dept to give me some work...

he gave me some materials bout bill of lading to read while waiting... after tat, wendy gave me my first job of the day... to help her check to confirm if the containers are recorded on both portnet system and sealiner, a program tat the coy developed... she also taught me how to use the systems... but i can't use it on my own cos i dun have an account...

work was disrupted halfway... cos the boss wanna bring us to see the big boss...

big boss office so nice... had a very very nice view of the sea... and sentosa too...

after i finished with her things, wendy asked sherlin for work to give me... in the end, sherlin put a big stack of papers for me to check... hahahaha... didn't manage to finish it today... but this is gd... cos it means i got something to do tml...

my dept still quite gd... at least got things to keep me busy... lp slacked the whole day... cos she got no desktop... so cannot contribute... hf and shi mei is more busy than i am... cos they deal with the customers directly and indirectly... then they can only make minimal mistakes... so more stress than me...

overall for today, so tired and drained of energy... but not too bad la... the coy ppl very frendly and the welfare of the staff is very gd... in the morning and mid afternoon there will be a lady pushing a trolley ard asking wat ppl wanna drink... service majiam on planes like tat...

okay la... need to go iron my clothes for tml le... then needa rest le...

ciaoz...

woohoo...

so happy today...

finally managed to get wat i wanted...

a new pair of shoes, new shirts... and a new skirt a few days ago...

hahahaha... quite guilty tat i spent so much...

hahahah... i think most ppl will get a shock if a say the price out... esp for the skirt...

hahaha... well... actually not a lot also la... the 2 shirts frm G2000 cost $59 together, the shoes frm U.R.S. inc costs $49.90 and the skirt frm mango costs $75...

but still... in total spent a LOT!! hahahah... add up is near $200...

but still... so happy cos the shoes is so nice... so are the shirts and skirt...

hehehehe...

well... gtg...

tired shopper...

ciaoz...

just read a email tat lp sent...

found something i dun really agree with...

bcos i love you, tat's why i let go of ur hand and return freedom to you...
bcos i love you, tat's why i will no longer let u feel troubled...
bcos i love you, tat's why i'd rather be sad alone...
bcos i love you, tat's why i'll force myself to leave...

i think tat's the dumbest things to do if bcos of this mentality then u break up with the other party... wat if the other party still loves u? just tat u nv notice... not only will u be hurt... but u will hurt the one who loves u even more deeply...

it hurts to love and not be loved in return... but it hurts more to not let ur feelings be known...

love is really a strange kind of feeling... but i think the most important thing is to let ur feelings be known... who knows tat if u really did, the two of u will become an item? dun live in regret tat u did not tell the other person how u feel...

true tat there's the fear of being rejected... but who knows... maybe the other person also feel the same way as u do...

hahaha... i think the best way to save ur pride and lessen the effect of being rejected is to send a "scout"... hahahaha... just someone who'd help u know how the other party feel bout u ba... to tell the truth, this is a rather useful way... esp if u r trying to find out the feeling of a ger... cos most gers wud tell each other how they feel if asked by someone they're close to...

ok... enough of this stupid issue bout love... hahahaha... getting mental again...

ciaoz...

well well...

my exams are finally over!!!

wahahahaha...

finally more free...

but...

got to give tuition to a p1 ger...

aiyo...

such a headache...

her exams are starting soon and she know nuts about wat she is studying...

how did she do her exams? well... she just put 1,2,3,4,5 for her answers... for MCQ somemore...

pengz~~

argh... got to teach her tml also...

sianz...

think i'll need to find a way to fa xie soon...

and finally notice one thing...

dun be a english teacher, esp if u are to teach lower pri... unless ur eng is super zai and can make them understand...

if i ever becomes a teacher, i'd definitely teach maths or chinese or even science... NEVER AGAIN ENGLISH!!!

ciaoz...

had the weirdest dream last night...

dreamt tat i got married... and to someone impossible to happen in real life...

hahahaha...

dunno y got this kinda dream also...

wasn't thinking bout anything like tat...

hmmm...

dreams are strange...

hahahahaha...

the dream happened on my wedding day... then was having wedding dinner... though was the "main character" there, but i was not sitting with family members... instead was sitting with my frens... hahahaha... receiving their well-wishes with my partner... surprisingly, those in my dream includes frens frm poly dayz, sec sch dayz and even pri sch dayz!! hahahaha...

then the scene suddenly change to a rm with a whole mirror wall... then i was touching up... hahahaha... remembered "scolding" the makeup artist cos she put my blusher until it's very red and uneven...

just then, got woken up by mr ryan lim...

weird dream isn't it...

hahahahaha....

ciaoz...

yes!! wahahahaha....

a success!!

finally got music up on my blog!!!

yeah!!!

hahahahahaha...

anyway, the title of the music u hear now is "The Name of Life"

hahaha... those of u who like to watch Hayao Miyazaki's work, u might find it familiar...

yup!! it's frm the anime movie "Spirited Away"!! hahahahaha...

enjoy~~

ciaoz...

basket... just put a song in for my blog... then the stupid browser dun wanna play it... grrrr.... dunno wth is wrong with it... damn...

argh argh argh!!! nvm... give up... gonna go study le...

will blog after 12 april...

wishing alvin belated bday, jq and hf early bday!!

ciaoz...

was busy with studies for the past few days... hahahaha... first time i so hardworking leh~~

well... shall blog frm tues till today...

tues...
met ty, hf, jac, mabel, lp and ly at 1030 for our csb roleplay... so dumb lor... we studying biz, in the end, we got a manufacturing situation... how we know all the machine parts wor~~ in the end, we prepare for a while, rehearse once and went to fc 1 to have lunch... hahahaha... yup... all the way frm one end of sp to the other end...

saw jianlong at fc 1... then saw a lot of spac2go juniors there also... hahahha... tat's for sure... cos most of them frm cls de...

had lunch then walk all the way back to biz block again... crazy rite? hahahha... but got too much time to spare le... in the end, we were still early for the roleplay... but tat's partly bcos ms tan is late... so the first grp started late also... but i think our grp's meeting roleplay is rather short... cos we finished in 20 min or maybe less than tat...

after the roleplay, hf, lp and me went up to the hrm tutorial rm... just rite the rm somehow nv lock... so went in to enjoy the aircon...

hrm tutorial is fun... after our grp completed the ans, i went to tok with hf they all... tat day so funny... hahahahha... someone brought a powerpuff gers' pencil case to sch... wahahahaha.... i think those in class knows who's tat... shall not name tat person here... the most funny thing is tat most ppl nv notice it... until the lecturer announce it out loud...

after tat, since she dun wanna go thru the answers yet, some of the begin to play pepsi cola at the back of the rm... hahahaha... damn funny... she still give them time to play...

after tat, time to present the ans... the first grp went up full force... then my grp also say wanna go up full force... but they very bad lor... in the end, only me and jl went up... then kana said by the lecturer and the whole class...

after tat was pdwm lecture... super short lect... cos after he go thru the syllabus and we know which is not tested, we made him stop... since the topic he's going to teach is not in the exam... hahahaha... got back our pdwm ca2 results... hahahaha... all i can say is tat i have to put in extra effort for this module...

reach hm played with ryan for a while before i take my nap... hahaha... after dinner, started doing my fma tutorial... finally figure out 1 of the question tat i cannot do last week... feel so gd to get the things rite... hahahaha...

wed...
was late for fma lect... spent most of the time copying the ans to the past year paper while toking to hf...

went to have lunch at pizza hut since hrm was released an hour earlier... hahaha... rare to have a class outing... called antony... but he not in his rm... after tat, he called us... but no one picked up the phone... hahahaha... ta bao 2 slices of pizza for him... hahahaha... cos we cannot finish it...

saw krishnan on the way back to sb... if he nv met us, he'd have forgotten bout the tutorial...

the tutorial was super short... cos he only go thru 2 questions...

since time was still early before the talks start, me and hf went to spac2go clubrm to chit chat... hahahaha... toked alot of things la... nan de tok to her like tat...

went for the talk... there's 2 tok tat day... one on bachelor of social work... the other on being SIA cabin crew... escaped off earlier to go hm with hf since we got tqm test the next day... in the end, nv manage to go hm much earlier cos raining cats and dogs in wdl... shopped ard in cwp... looked for formal biz wear since i have to wear it daily for itp... but like nothing like tat leh...

studied for my tqm test... all the way until i fell asleep at 0100...

thurs...
was late for csb minutes test... one of the last few to arrive in class.... the test so dumb... tok a lot of irrelevant things... then not clear de... such a lousy quality... tsk tsk... in the end, had to ask ard to confirm the details...

went late for tqm tutorial since it's the other class tat's presenting... hahahaha... had an early lunch before going in... he cut short the last grp's presentation... then gave a few tips before releasing us...

went to t2241 for free access... actually is just book a com to enjoy the aircon while waiting for next lesson to start...

antony's class was again super relaxed... hahahaa... today's the best man... he came in then tok cock with us... hf kept asking bout his love story... bout him and his wife... how they met etc... hahahahaha... majiam gou zai dui like tat... hahahahaha....

tested alvin on tqm... he really can remember almost everything... thru testing him, i also managed to remember more things... hahahahaha...

tqm test was rather easy... actually is very easy cos when we see the question paper, then we started asking each other le... hahahaha... was stucked at one question... heng rohaidah asked miszah tat question during the test then i managed to overhear it...

after the test, went out with my class ppl... hahahaha... got 2 sides jio me...hf jio me go cwp shopping for formal wear, then the guys jio me go watch movie... in the end, went jp to watch spongebob squarepants the movie with mabel and jac... hahahaha... it's a bloody lame and cock show la... laugh all the way man... the guys actually wanna go watch the eye 10 de... but front row left... so they nv watch...

after the movie, went long john to have dinner... chit chat until 10 plus then left there... was at the mrt station when jq called... then waited for them... hahahaha.... can't imagine 4 guys eating and chit chatting all the way frm 7 pm till 10 plus pm... didn't know guys so chang qi one... hehehehehe....

ok la... tat's all for now... nothing much left le....

ciaoz...

yeah~~ finally got my hair cut... hahahaha... almost 6 mths nv cut my hair le... hahahaha...

anyway, finally saw ryan today... he still as naughty as before... but his temper har... tsk tsk... getting frm bad to worse le... but i just love to bully him... hahahahaha... but he also got bully me... he disrupt my sleep...

when i'm napping just now, he came up on my bed and started playing with my hair... hahaha... he so cute... he took off my rubber band and say he wanna help me style my hair...

anyway, dunno wat else to say le... now on the sleeping mode le...

gtg sleep liao... tml still got csb meeting roleplay...

ciaoz...

hmmm.... too tired for the past few days to blog... reach hm at bout 2 am everyday... then super tired le considering tat i had to look after, chase after 4 young kids, the oldest being 6 yrs old...

so many things i had to do... on tues, i had to go to sch... at first plan to pon pdwm lect de... cos too tired to go... but in the end still went for it... after sch, went to cwp to buy slippers before going my grandma hse... cos my slippers is bright green in colour... then not suitable for the funeral...

went up my grandma hse to change... waited like an idiot for the toilet... in the end, i realised tat there's no one in there... my grandma closed the door to prevent my young cousins frm going in, in case they slipped... so stupid of me rite? i didn't even go and open the door... hahahaha... while waiting, my da jie came... so in the end, i went down with her...

my bro and my cousins stayed over on tues nite... i wanted to also... but then my mum dun allow... so bo bian went hm... took my uncle's lorry hm...

when at hm, i started playing maple story... cos my cousin ask me to go online to play with him... so tat i kill and he leech my exp... end up he nv come online... but my bro did...

wed...
the third day of the wake... got prayers on tat day... then if i go to sch, it'd be too late for it... so pon the whole day... went at 11am... walk to my grandma hse with my da jie... she also pon sch tat day...

play poker with my cousins... they so funny.. play tai ti the punishment is to drink a cup of water... nv join them la... just watch only...

was the "childcare" for quite a while... have to kept going after the kids...

prayer session started at 7pm... was quite tiring cos need to stand and kneel, stand and kneel... then with the kids is even worse...

all the offerings were to be burnt tat nite... then while they are preparing, i had to hold the four little kids back... cos the adults scared they might go near the fire... and i was the one to hold them back... until a distant relative call me to go and give offerings to my grandpa... then i moved the kids to the maid before going off...

had to hold hands to form a circle while the fire burns... then have to tell my grandpa wat's the unit no of his new hse... according to the priest... but me and my cousins dunno wat he saying.... and dunno wat's the no... so left it to the adults...

helped clearing up tat nite... also helped to keep the tables after the whole thing ended... while pushing the table top to a corner, it hit my leg... hahaha... clumsy rite? got swollen on the spot... found a big blue black tat nite...

was nervous bout the tqm presentation tat nite... cos the next day presentation and i haven't look thru a single thing... almost everyone stayed over tat nite... except for me... sob sob... if not for the presentation, i would've stayed le...

thurs...
last day of wake, also the day to send my grandpa to the crementorium... had to go sch for presentation... at first dun wanna go too early de... cos my mum told me the prayers start at 11 am, the time of tqm lesson...

anyway, requested to leave early tat day... and tat lecturer so chin chai de lor... so rite after i presented, i went off le... came hm to put all my stuff before going my grandpa's wake... when i reach there, they still praying... then can't squeeze in also... cos dun have joss sticks and incense paper... so after i changed, i join my cousin, jie sheng, whose leg is in case, so he cannot join them... stood there with him... then when i got a chance, i squeezed into the procession after my cousin...

managed to look at my grandpa one last time before they sealed the coffin completely... my aunts cried at tat point in time... was really sad at tat time... cos i will nv get to see him ever again... finally dropped my tears... and after tat, was crying all the way when we're supposed to sit by his coffin while the priest prays... the scene was really bad... cos everyone's crying, esp all the females... had a short rest while waiting to send my grandpa on a last journey... asked my dad to help me put my slippers on the bus...

anyway, just to mention for easy reference, the 4 youngest cousins of mine are jolene, kelvin, ivan and gary...

carried ivan while walking for th last journey... the ground is too hot for the kids to walk... mind u, it's 2 in the afternoon with a blazing sun... so have to carry him... jolene was carried by her uncle. kelvin was carried by my another cousin and poor gary... he had to walk... cos my cousin, wei hao, had carried his bro, kelvin, for the prayers just before going off... in the end, i still made wei hao carry gary... cos its really hot...

on the way, ivan kept toking to me... he was saying tat he saw the maid throwing my grandpa's bed away, tat we are going to burn my grandpa le... tat we had to walk on the hot floor... tat we're not going to see my grandpa again le... smart rite? and guess how old is he? he's just 4 yrs old lor...

halfway, wei hao put gary down again... then my er jie took over carrying him, while my bro offered to carry ivan for me.... when we were near a zebra crossing, my er jie told my da jie to carry gary after tat... in the end, when my da jie carry him, it's time we board the bus...

on the way there, gary is super quiet... ivan was toking non-stop as usual... jolene was with her dad and kelvin was with tat same cousin who carried him... gary only toked when he saw the zoo road sign... cos my grandpa was to be cremented at mandai crementorium...

the environment there is very nice.... really... it's very new i think... it looks new anyway... the sadest part is when my grandpa is sent to be cremented... the priest told all of us to shout to my grandpa's spirit to be careful of the fire... in the end, we dun even know wat's going on until much later... cos our generation hokkien not gd... then no one translate for us... but it's really saddening cos everyone including those distant relatives broke down into tears... even my mum.... then my da yi and san yi is the worse... they cry until my mum have to support my da yi and my san yi zhang have to support my san yi...

when we left the viewing rm, my xiao yi was sobbing in her husband's arms... i see already also very sad...

after tat, we have to unpin the "xiao"... it's different cloth pin onto the t-shirt to show ur relationship with the decease... then took off the socks to wear our shoes to go back hm... here comes the pai sei part... as earlier, i ask my dad to put my slipper on the bus... in the end, my dad dunno pass to who... end up my slippers was lost and i had to go back bare-footed... then my sis they all very bad... still make me walk to get them drinks when they had their shoes on lor... then the floor is so badly littered with peanut shells... sharp one lor...

luckily for me, my dad found my slippers in the end... dunno frm who also... after lunch, went up to my grandma hse... super tired by then... but cannot go hm yet... cos need to settle all the stuff... then having dinner there also...

finally went hm at 6 plus... then took my uncle's lorry hm again... after showering and the last episode of 1/2 yuan fen, i went to sleep le... super duper tired...

fri...
went to sch as usual... think i left sch too early for this one whole week... hf they all so funny... ask me today no need to leave early ar? hahaha... actually wanna go collect my grandpa's ashes with my mum de... but dun wanna be late for lecture... so in the end nv go...

went to spac2go clubrm to put my photo for ndp... dunno if the photo can ma... cos was taken when i'm in sec 3... but bo bian la... no time this week to go take photo...

skipped my lunch cos dun feel like eating after i went back to sb frm saa... fma was next... luckily, i did my fma tutorial last week le... so this wk no need to do...

had my usual picnic during tms lecture... hahahaha... got western food in... so nice... hahahahaha... wun get caught cos jq sitting in front of me... and block me frm ms ok's view.. hahahaha... the advantage of sitting at the last row...

after the 1st hr of lect, we got a break... then i got yogurt drink and an apple in... hahahaha... eat something oily le have to get fruits to clear my intestine... hahahaha... tok cock...

anyway, did nothing constructive frm fri nite till now... play solitaire all the time... ar bo is watch tv... sianz~~

anyway, the only gd news is tat i got my itp attachment le... it's at 78 shenton way, which is so much closer to tanjong pagar mrt than raffles place... the pay is 440 bucks and i'm in the same coy as lp and hf... got gd and got bad la...

gtg... need to have my beauty sleep le... super tired since i broke my record... got up at 8am this morning... tired tired tired...

ciaoz...

first day of the funeral... not alot of ppl there today... only my uncles and aunties and cousins there... alot of customs to follow...

not feeling too sad today... only nearly cry 3 times today... 1st was when i told ty bout this on the train this morning... 2nd was when i told hf and the 3rd time was when i'm chatting with my er jie on the way frm je to wdl...

was supposed to go over right after sch de... but they doing tqm presentation... so stayed behind to do with them... msged er jie to see if she wanna meet then she called back saying she's at boon lay le... then meeting me at je... so i passed my work to lp they all and left...

the funeral is not under my grandma hse tat block... but was at the next block... cos her block got too little space on the ground floor to carry out the funeral...

was made to changed into a white t-shirt provided by the casket... then when me and my er jie went down, had to pin a piece of cloth on the left sleeve... have to pray to my grandpa first then started to help them fold the incense paper into ingots... helped to burn incense paper also... have to keep it burning... think it represents smooth journey to the underworld ba... not too sure also... then cannot ask on the spot...

first time saw my grandma since sat... she looks ok la... but got teary eyes when the distant relatives ask about my grandpa... the only ppl who cried until very jialat is my grandpa's siblings...

had to look after my cousins also... so many young kids there... then one of them kept clinging onto me... kept asking me to carry him... bring them to the playground he only wan me to carry him and dun wanna play... end up my hands until now still trembling...

super tired le... dunno wat i toking le... think i need sleep badly... tml still muz go and help...

ciaoz...

decided to open up this blog for all to see...

okok... new ppl seeing my blog, i have to repeat the same thing...

discuss my blog can... but pls dun say out the contents in front of me... i seriously dun like it...

those whose blog i linked, if u dun want me to link ur blog to mine, just tell me... drop a msg in the tagboard to say so...

if u wanna link my blog in ur's, feel free to do so... i dun mind de...

tat's bout all...

ciaoz...

stunned... just so stunned... suddenly just lost my grandpa... well tat's according to my cousin... hopefully it's not true... now still waiting for my mum to come hm frm the hospital...

my grandpa was not feeling too well since a few years ago... i know tat... but i dunno wat is he down with...

on sat, heard frm my mum tat he was hospitalised again... but this time, the condition was not too gd... tat day only heard my mum saying tat the doc told my aunt tat if we wanna visit him muz faster visit le... so accompanied my mum to the hospital with my da jie...

ok... anyway my mum just called... it's bad news... my cousin is correct... my grandpa just passed away at 10.20 pm...

suddenly got tears in my eyes... gosh... cannot be so emotional now... have to be strong for my mum... just wat's wrong with me... i tot i wun cry... cos not too close to my grandpa... but...

ok... let me just continue frm sat... went to the hospital with my mum, my da jie and my san yi (my mum's third sis)... think my san yi can't really stand it le... cos she went out of the ward so many times... then her eyes looks teary... after tat, my qi jiu (my mum's 7th bro) and my er jiu (my mum's second bro) came up frm the foodcourt... after tat, my da jiu mu (my mum's eldest bro's wife) came with 2 of her kids, my xiao yi's family (my mum's youngest sis) and my liu jiu's (my mum's sixth bro) family came together... next to cry was my da jie... she just broke down in the arms of her bf... seeing her cry, i think a lot of them also on the verge of crying le... usually when i see ppl cry, i'll break down too... but this time, i held back my tears... if i also cry, then they might all break down... and my mentality tat time was to be strong for my mum and thx god tat he's still alive... i shouldn't cry at tat point in time cos he's still not gone yet... but it's really heart wrenching to see him in pain... he was hooked up on machines and when we visited him tat day, he barely opened his eyes to see us... when my aunts they all called out to him, he also barely responded...

there's a life and death situation in his ward yesterday... the one on his right side died yesterday... at 5.20pm... cos my mum they all overheard... the patient's family was crying so badly... she was saying something like " you are a gd man... move on in peace and find a gd family to reincarnate" ... i was so sad then... but tat's life... one has to go thru birth, aging sickness and death...

msged my er jie when we're bout to go hm... cos she coming hm on sat... in the end, she wanted to come visit my grandpa also... so we waited for her...

went hm on a cab... tat nite, my mum told us tat my grandpa's condition is really bad... he might just past away in these few days... he was dignosed with cancer a few years ago... it was just small then... but being stuborn, he refused any form of treatment... during the third day of lunar new year this year, when he went back for checkup, the doc say it's best if he undergo chemo... thou it wun heal him... but at least can prolong his life... but he just doesn't wanna go thru it...

yesterday his condition still not tat bad... although in pain, he could still sleep in the position tat he always do... but today when we go and visit him in the evening, he could barely move into tat position... in fact, he could barely move and barely moved...

argh... why does my da jie have to be sniffing away in the background and bring back the tears in my eyes??

can see tat his condition had sort of worsen today... even my bro who my went yesterday can tell... just reached hm not too long ago... then at 10 plus, my xiao yi called my mum to ask her to get ready... cos the doc called them to say tat things dun look gd and he's in a critical condition le... then they all going to rush to the hospital and will fetch her there also... wanted to go with my mum... to at least try to give her some support... but i dunno if it's bad news will i be ready to handle it... who knows it might be my mum giving me support... and with one less person, my mum will be able to cope with comforting my grandma, my aunts and my uncles...

frm these 2 days, i really admire my mum... she can be so strong for her family... tat day, a lot of them already got teary eyes le... but only my mum is the exception... and when she called just now, i expect her to be unable to speak... but her voice is still the same as always and doesn't sound shaky... ask me to pick up the phone or to tok to someone, i dun think i'll be able to tok for long before i break down...

ok... better dun say much now...

ciaoz...

nothing much these few days... just tat i've officially retired!!! hahahaha... actually is stepped down frm my financial secretary duty in spac2go... and guess wat? the one who took over me is none other than hf... hahahaha... easy job la... think it's easier for her to come find me if she got any prob with the job... but dun think she'd have la... her a/c tok kong one... so no worries...

had tms ca on fri... so on thurs, the pdwm tutorial was super pathetic... only 10 turned up... and all females... hahahaha... like hf they all say, our class basically turned into a ger's sch le... all the guys in my class pon lesson... so rare lor... esp so for jq...

was doing hrm project on fri... finally finished it... and it's printed le... hehehe... now only need to reherse for the roleplay le...

spent the whole of my sat slacking at hm... was actually supposed to be filled with events... but all got cancelled on fri nite... sadz rite... hahahaha... sometimes feel tat i have no life de... everyday slack at hm... no one jio me out...

sun was no diff... spend the whole of today reading jane green's book... and i finished it... didn't take long la.. considering tat tv was my top piority...

hmmm.... just wonder if i'd ever meet someone how knows me inside out...

ciaoz...

okok... try to keep it as short as possible.....

sat went to do hrm project at 8 am... crazy rite? do project at 8 am at yew tee... after tat went back to sch to do tqm project at 1130... meeting time was 1130... but hrm ended too early... so went shopping at NTUC at bukit batok... end up i'm late... but lp and mabel even later than me... so me and jac start first... sp cheat ppl money de... pay so much sch fees in the end so many plugs cannot use... have to go fc 5 to do project... project all the way until 4 plus... then went hm le... my sis they all were making dumplings when i reach hm... so joined them in making...

sun nothing much... went to my grandma hse to play with ryan... he so cute... got bright yellow slippers...

mon was spent rushing project again... after tms, alvin their grp was saying tat they restrict themselves to eat lunch for 20 min... then mabel so funny... she say to them tat our grp will beat them by using only 10 min to eat... so we da bao frm fc 6 and went to efac le... hahahaha.... lp ate at efac cos she have to take care of our belongings... then the rest of us went to eat at the nearby stairs... like cleaners like tat... hahahaha... but feel so bad for leaving lp alone at efac... so ate as fast as possible... then we went back to start our project le... was indeed so much faster than their grp... stayed in sch until 11... reach hm then drop dead on bed le...

tues met lp at 1000 at bukit batok... cos needa go her workplace take pics for tqm... end up both of us also late... took a few pics... then went to the mac there to eat breakfast... finally got to use m vouchers le... got 5 buck left... then only paid 30 cents for the meal... shared with lp... then went to sch le... stopped at convention there... cos needa pass $$ to alex for the agm and peer counselling... saw jianlong on bus duty also... hahaha... shuai ge leh... he so friendly tat no matter whenever he saw me he also wave and smile at me... hahahaha... fa hua chi le... help frankie and zhenglong then went off at 12... cos doing hrm at tat time... end up i was the earliest... followed by ty, pl and rohaida...was toking bout supernatural things there... then end up alot of things happened... pl was telling us her incident in sb... then in the end, we took the same lift... when we went in, the cleaner was telling us tat the lif broke down just before... so hopefully it doesn't breakdown again... pl was so freaked out lor... luckily nothing happened la.. reach 6th floor then pl wan to fill water... end up me and ty walk slower... but nv stop to wait for her cos gurdip's there also... then she so funny... ask gurdip to wait for her cos she scared to be alone... hahaha.. actually there's more tat happened than wat i can say here... ask me personally for details if u wanna know... hrm project is roughly finishing... after sch continued with tqm... and finally, we finished it by 11 pm!!! so happy... even cover page also finish and everything is printed le... only left the pics to sort out then can hand in the project le!! think our's the fastest grp in the whole class ba...

wed... actually got duty in morning de... but in the end, changed to afternoon shift with huixian... went to do a bit of the appendix before going for duty... was late due partly to the rain... have to walk a longer route... did duty with eugene... a bit strange... cos nothing much to tok about... then he kept slacking on the job... hahahaha... i was there standing while he sat down... today's shift not bad la... got another shuai ge doing duty... he's not exactly too shuai la... but his features not bad looking... just tat complexion not too gd... and his name is alvin... hahahhaa... actually i think guys call alvin de all quite gd looking la... anyway, tat's for all the alvins i've met... hahahaha... finally got the photos taken on tues... not bad... bringing it to sch tml...

ok la.... gtg shower and sleep le...

ciaoz...

argh... the laptop screen getting frm bad to worse le...

did i mention before tat green tea kit kat is very nice?

okok... shall begin my entry for today...

went to sch at 9 thou lessons start at 11... cos to do hrm project... was supposed to go saa to pass karen something for said... for peer counselling de... so suai lor... when i go there, karen was with ms angelvin and mrs lim... mrs lim still know me... but angelvin didn't even know who the hell i am... so was karen... but heck la... she know who said is then can le... was late for my project due to this... did some editing for the project... then went for PDWM lecture... nothing much during lecture la... after tat, went for lunch... went up to the lab with mabel they all... tok cock there... then alvin took a video of us... hahaha... so funny... cos we were actually chit chatting while he's taking it... then recorded our laughter in as well... quite funny la... FMA was ok... just tat krishnan kept walking ard... hahaha... it's bad cos i nv do my tutorial...

today's TMS lecture is the first lecture tat i nv feel like dozing off de... wahahahaha... got a super big cup of lime juice, a cinnemon(watever the spelling) roll and an apple into lecture hall... was sitting between hf and alvin... hahahaha... lucky got the guys to entertain me... otherwise sure bored to death de... hahahaha... was doing something when ms ok called me to answer some question... hahahaha... gave her a stupid answer... cos i dunno wat the hell she toking...

after lesson, went to do tqm project at efac... edited a lot of lp's part... well... cos we started with her's... went off at 7... cos have to come hm for my bro's bday... feel so bad having to leave early...

well... gtg sleep early tonight le... tml gonna rush projects again le... hrm 8am at yew tee... followed by tqm at 1130am in sch... wah... dying...

ciaoz...

ok... try to keep this as short as possible... gtg do my tqm project soon...

first thing first... i upgraded my blog le... now u all can link to other frens of mine frm my blog... have to thx stan for making this possible... cos he taught me the codes to do it... thx so much!!

today nothing much really happened... had csb at 8am... was quite early... the fourth to reach... saw jac on the way... called out to her... but her cd player on very loud... then she nv hear me... until we're at the door of the class... hahahaha... csb did a sample test paper... was fun doing the biz letter with ty... she's my partner for this test...

next was tqm... diana lim's last lesson with us... think she actually quite gd la... hf they all cannot find the coy she still will be reasonable as in give them extra time to complete instead of blaming them for not searching earlier... then watever question u ask she'd also answer... today's lesson super short... she complete in 1 hr's time... then release us early... was hungry... so didn't wait for hf their grp to finish asking her questions... after lunch, went to biz library to do project... at first wanna go study area de... but there too many ppl until no space le... library also no better... but at 1 then ppl start to clear out le... found this very interesting book on cartoon drawings done by cartoonists... it's very very nice...

next lesson is pdwm tutorial... antony as usual very slack... was crapping during his lesson... all went on friendster to see their prospective bd grp members... hahaha... i'm so fortunate... so far, my bd grp all shuai ge... not bad la... hahahaha... then dunno y they start toking bout how bd might change ppl's lives.. like maybe next time after yr 3 will see me and alvin hold hands... hahahaha.... wat rubbish lor... hahahaha... so funny...

went hm with hf, sp, jq and alvin... hahahaha... so nan de they take red line... esp alvin... cos they go yew tee to interview the person for tqm... so got company until yew tee... better than nothing... tok cock on the way as usual... saw the white noisy ad on today's today... hahahaha... think the pic look like a combi of monkey and pig... haahhahaha...

ok la... here i end my entry... will blog again...

ciaoz...